II

(Written during her retreat before receiving the habit.)

January 8, 1889.

Your little Lamb—as you love to call me, dearest sister—would borrow from you some strength and courage. I cannot speak to Our Lord, and He is silent too. Pray that my retreat may be pleasing to the Heart of Him Who alone reads the secrets of the soul.

Life is full of sacrifice, it is true, but why seek happiness here? For life is but "a night to be spent in a wretched inn," as our holy Mother St. Teresa says. I assure you my heart thirsts ardently for happiness, but I see clearly that no creature can quench that thirst. On the contrary, the oftener I would drink from these seductive waters the more burning will my thirst become. I know a source where "they that drink shall yet thirst,"²⁴⁸²⁴⁸Eccles. 24:29. but with a delicious thirst, a thirst one can always allay. . . . That source is the suffering known to Jesus only.